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In fact, it's fair to say that it categorically does them harm. I believe that women tend to come into themselves -- appearance-wise -- much later in school than men. They're trained from a young age to be (often) unjustifiably self-assured, to eschew personality and affability for cocksure confidence, and to generally treat people like the feudal system is alive and kickin'. And because of this I think women tend to retain some memory of what it means to be liked (or disliked) for who one is, not how one looks. If the face you see in the mirror each morning makes you wince, take heart.
There are plenty of studies on this strangely anti-Darwinian phenomenon - studies which I think don't answer the question as well as I, with my oh-so-steadfast opinions, can, do, and will. Let's talk about what exactly is wrong with these conventionally attractive men, and let's talk about what is right about these, well, conventionally -attractive men.
Anecdotal evidence aside, I know for a fact that I don't find "hot" men attractive.* Let me clarify - I find them pleasing to the eye, and every so often quite tempting, but I don't find myself actually attracted to them. [Disclaimer: This post should in no way indicate that my boyfriend is ugly and/or unattractive.
For some of us our goals regarding marriage itself evolve (or in my case, disappear), but the broader dream of snagging the most attractive women on the market stays intact for just about every guy. By simple human nature and evolutionary biology, our eyes are drawn to them first.
For most of us, being intimate with an attractive woman triggers a much more intense sexual arousal, everything else being equal.
'If everyone is going after the most common characteristics, then someone who targets the rare ones, would have an advantage.' Dr Brooks, based at the University of New South Wales, in Sydney, said the phenomenon could be related to special proteins called MHC molecules, which are part of the immune system.